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thesis update

So ... there's good thesis news and bad thesis news. On average more good than bad, but the bad is pretty scary and kind of intertwined with the good. A week ago, I had a really intense bout of anxiety (maybe also depression?). I just felt like shit all day and pretty much nothing I did helped for longer than I was actively doing it. Things got to a very, very low point. Fortunately, I could tell I was in a bad way and I didn't try to push myself, and the next day when I met my advisor he made sure I got the help I needed. In the past week I've met with two different psychiatrists, and tomorrow I'm meeting with my resident dean.

Now the good news: I have the English and WGS departments' permission to hand in my thesis at the WGS department deadline, March 13, rather than the English department deadline, March 3. My friends have been supporting me really wonderfully. My advisor has been so helpful, so understanding, just ... so good, I can barely articulate it. And, due I'm sure in no small part to all of that, my thesis is actually going really well. A week ago I was terrified that I wouldn't finish. Now I'm confident that I will and I'm excited about making it good.

I'm making this post primarily because I want my friends to know that my social media pause is going to be continuing until the 13th. Also, I want to reassure anyone who might be worrying about how my thesis is going. It was going pretty poorly, and I'm still in a very weird and variable emotional state, but with all the support I have, I'm going to make it through with something I'm proud of. Thanks so much to everyone who has and is continuing to help me out. I'll be back to constantly posting selfies on the 13th.

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My advisor has been so helpful, so understanding, just ... so good, I can barely articulate it.

When I was having an anxiety-crippled final semester of my own, my adviser went so above and beyond what I imagined he might possibly do to support me that it still chokes me up to think about it. So yeah, I get this thing you said. And I'm glad you were able to get that level of support.

Best wishes for finishing up your thesis!


Intelligent support and just that little bit more time will make all the difference in the world. I think this thesis is going to be good: you can do this!

Your advisor is a mensch. I so hope I can have you both to tea afterward.

With good hopes for making harbor,


I am so glad that your advisor is not only understanding but helpful on a serious practical level. Mine was...I adore him to this very day, but let us say that my anxious horrible last semester is not why. So I am so glad that things have gotten turned around for you and are, while still stressful and full of work, on a good and supported path.

Knowing when to ask for or accept support is an incredibly valuable tool for self care. It's great to hear you're in an environment that will help you pull through with a thesis you feel good about.

I'm so glad you're getting the support you need to write a thesis that's awesome, and looking forward to seeing you around the internets when you come back!

Go you go you go you and many hugs!

Good for you for reaching out to your advisor and lining up some people who can help with the depression/anxiety. And that is excellent news about your thesis!

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